Who Are You

Hello hello Holy is back here

It’s been a while huh?

How are you guys doing? I hope everyone is doing okay, Medan has been really hot lately, for those who lives in there please drink water regularly and use sun protection. The sun is ruthless these days.

Someone asked me last night to write in English, I hope this is okay for local readers.
As foreign readers, welcome, I hope you enjoying your stay.
As for me, my daily life still normal, work, chores, and lack of creativity too. But I manage. I am trying to be haha

Not many things happened, I just feel stuck at the moment. I’ve suffered a little bit of relapse, and I am trying to go back to my good routine. Things are doing okay now. I’ve done my work a head of time so I can enjoy myself more.

These days like another acceptance of myself for being dumb and hard to myself.

And it’s like some miracle when I am in the middle of it, BTS’ new album came out. It’s called MAP OF THE SOUL : PERSONA. Very good album, so many pinks, so much happiness in this album. I recommend it for you guys.

When the teaser released I’ve been in a very bad headspace. I thought to changing myself more to what people said, which is like a very stupid of me when I finally comfortable with myself and thriving and hoping for more good days.

And then this title track from BTS new album came out, called Intro : Persona. This time RM who open the new era of BTS album.

This exact song made me think again about who the hell am i? the whole song is actually a jam, and the lyrics tell us a story how RM faced his own Persona.

Ah… if you ever Persona series by Atlus you might be have more understanding about what is Persona, it’s not just about a characteristic. But how many of yourself you have inside you, and do you realize them or not? As for me that is persona from what I experienced by playing this game and read a few things about it.

You can also dig in about Persona in a book by Murray Stein , titled ‘Jung’s Map of The Soul’.

And again, as I said before, I’ve accept that I need time to redo myself, I’ve accept myself from the past, from the cringe one, to the person who is stone cold. The me who lost so much precious part of myself and redo it again. I’ve accept it all, and I aimed to be a good person as I can.

And there is someone close to me who make me to change myself and it made me into panic mode, but again as I said before. This intro made me rethink again.
“Dear myself
You must never lose your temperature
Cuz you don't need to be neither warm nor cold”

This particular verse that me rethink when I thought should I do it? And the answer is of course is no.

Oh my I’ve talked about BTS again hahah

I can’t help it. They are a big part of my growth into self love. And it’s like the universe aligned my time and their time to meet. And I feel like DNA all over again. Which means ‘none of this is coincidence’, even if it is, what a lucky coincidence.

Because months before this album came out with a lot of pink, I started to really like pink, pastel, but mostly pink, I even brought a really nice pink shirt with flower.

When I think about this,  I thought, I bloomed? Because my style is really dark, the make up, the clothes, the vibe, I always wear black, and my makeup is always heavy with black eyeshadow and eyeliner, I even wear dark lipstick lol

 I feel the world is brighter, the sun is always shining, I always take my time to see the sun rise and sun set on the way I go and back from my work. I also take my time to admire the moon, the night sky, and I thought. I really am blooming and I thanked Allah for making this beautiful world.

So, I hope you guys are okay, take your time when things are bad. And feels the gratitude when it better. Because it will be always better.

With Love
Good Bye

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