I Was A Selfish Person

Even now i am a selfish person, more than before

Because a couple years ago i only think of myself. How the world is unfair to me and why on earth luck is not on my side. I don't even care how people feels toward me, but i am aware of that. Sometimes it gaves me freedom, sometimes it didn't.Lately i have been thinking, i met new people. Good people. I always surrounded by many not so good people. Because of that it even surprised me when someone gave me a little kindness.

They are great people, and i grew fond of them. They make me realizes many things. That is why i am still a very selfish people Because i hate the fact that i am aware of the society works, the world works, and how the people works. I guess i am getting matured. I guess i finally understand what does it mean the world will treat you kindly if you kind to the world, because before, i only understand that i am a speck of dust, living in a floaty planet, in this galaxy. I am unnoticed and insignificant.

So why the universe need to care about me?

But again, like i said before, i have been thinking, how the world works, how i am from the person who is very quite and awkward and even don't care what happened out there, become care, to my parents that i have grown hate in my young adult life, now i love them dearly like i was small child, to think that i better left alone to like to accompany people and help them.

Where i was a self centered person, to a loving and caring person that aware that people have it rough, even than mine. World and the way to adulthood is weird. There are people out there who are older than me and not realizing that they are so selfish and not caring for the world There are people younger than me that are very caring and really humble, they even can show love in the most loving way.

I am not a really loving person too, i am loving but don't know how to show it, that is why 

sometimes people misunderstand me for being cold.

I love hugs too

But i can't hug people that i love because my culture taught us that hug is too intimate if you doing it to someoen is not your lover, relative or the same gender. I hope everyone doing okay i hope we can be better to the world, i hope the universe will be kind to us a little bit.